The Chad Is (Not) Great

I have been following the Vallow-Daybell case since early 2020 - after Nate Eaton of East Idaho News followed them to Hawaii but well before the children were found.

If you're not familiar with the case you may try this as a primer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-GuonthUgY
A Who's-Who follows at the end of this blog
It's an incredibly complicated case with multiple conspirators, multiple victims, links to multiple states - principally Idaho, Arizona, and Hawaii - and, I kid you not, religious cult practices and ZOMBIES.

What follows are my personal opinions only.

EDIT: 7th June 2024

I have now been sitting on the Death Penalty ruling for a little while. As a Brit, I am not a fan; as someone who thinks Lori is the more responsible party, I am not a fan; as someone who thought the body of evidence was weak, I am not a fan... but I'm okay with it.

Which is a relief.

The thing is, I had expected a decent defence. A scenario where it would be hard to discern where the truth lay. But we didn't have that so I am comfortably assured of his guilt.

The defence I anticipated would have gone something along the lines of

• Lori taught Chad light / dark (throw her under the bus properly)
• Lori persuaded him he had the divination skill / ability to judge light / dark, reveal death percentages, identify possessing demons etc (to explain Chad's texts - after all, we don't have evidence to real-world conversations so anything could have been said)
• Lori said Tylee had run away to Annie's (or someone else from her dad's side - to explain her absence)
• Lori said Kay had taken JJ (or someone else from his dad's side - to explain his absence)
• Chad and Lori therefore didn't have custody of any minors (explaining what happened in Hawaii)
  Chad didn't have to know his new wife was still pocketing the kids' Social Security money
• Lori and Alex knew when his house would be empty so they could dispose of the bodies and frame him
• The storage place video was just him helping her out with some stuff, couples do that
• Tammy died after ingesting something Chad brought home from Lori or Alex
  
• The whole murder-by-asphyxiation-because-they-couldn't-find-an-actual-cause-of-death thing was pretty ludicrous; and IMHO not taking a medical history from family members was an inexcusable lapse - medical records are not reliable. Neither, of course, is family testimony but it builds a picture
• Chad was an idiot, sure - but who thinks their girlfriend is bumping people off?! You just don't expect that... so he didn't see the signs

It still wouldn't have held up as Lori and Chad BOTH told people Tylee had died but there was doubt to be cast and then the defence just didn't. 

So yes, I am comfortable with the sentence passed.

Yesterday an Idaho court found Chad Guy Daybell guilty on all charges - now it is only to be decided whether he gets Life Without Parole, or the Death Penalty. His second wife, Lori Vallow (nee Cox), was convicted last year and she only escaped the possibility of being executed for her crimes by opting for a speedy trial.

I have mixed feelings about this as I am British and not a big fan of the death penalty. I can see it when there is exceptional cruelty, torture, sadism etc. but while this is NASTY I don't feel it meets my personal threshold. I am also conflicted as I feel Lori was far more guilty of the two.
There was evidence of manipulation on both sides but Joe Ryan (and Stacey Cope) died BEFORE she even met Chad. I wouldn't be at all surprised if a lot of the incriminating things he texted were seeded by Lori. Lori was the main person to benefit from ALL the deaths, even Tammy's. During the trial it was brought up how the only link between Alex and Tammy, who he tried to shoot, was Chad. That's not true: the link is LORI. Alex was trying to kill Tammy to clear the way for Lori to marry Chad... he was doing it for HER, not HIM!
In fact, had I been on the jury I couldn't have found Chad guilty on the evidence provided. Sure, it was a series of unfortunate coincidences, and there's no way on earth he was innocent, but the case never progressed onto anything solid. There were no witnesses, no forensics, none of those really damning things that seals the baddie's fate in crime dramas.
It leaves me feeling antsy about due process because if they can convict someone of first degree murder on so little there's not much hope of justice for the wrongly accused.

Just because the kids bodies were buried on his property doesn't mean he had to have known they were there... by that logic Tammy and their son Garth both had to be in on it too cos they were there as well!
I would have thought there'd be SOMETHING tangible - a witness to the fire that destroyed Tylee for example, someone who'd seen him dig the pit or collect the firewood. The police found Tylee's DNA on a couple of Chad's tools but opted not to fingerprint them to see who'd handled them last?! Honestly, I'm with John Prior (Chad's lawyer) on that one - it had been the best part of a year and Chad hadn't cleaned or reused the tools to destroy that evidence??? Yeah, that screams set-up.

Tammy's death bothers me enormously: there was no technical cause of death found so they ruled asphyxiation / homicide. HUH?
People die in their sleep, suddenly and of no apparent cause, all the time. SIDS (Cot Death) is well known about in infants but at any age essentially the same thing can happen, something a lot of people don't know about until it happens to someone close. Just because you can't find a cause does not equal murder, any more than multiple cot deaths in a family indicates murder (see: Sir Roy Meadow).
One suspected case I recall was that of the son of British actor Nicholas Lyndhurst; a second (private) autopsy found the cause of death to be leukaemia. Did they check Tammy for leukaemia? Her family said she'd been tired, breathless, bruised easily... all of which would fit.

The fact that they relied on her medical record and didn't talk to her family is incredibly problematic to me. Although it is dangerous to BELIEVE the family they certainly ought to be part of the investigation. For example, they made a big deal of sleep apnoea not being on her medical record but that just means she never sought treatment or diagnosis - at least one of her kids claims that they and Tammy's father have it. That's what we'd call a relevant family history right there; an inherited trait to STOP BREATHING IN YOUR SLEEP (which would also explain Tammy's alleged tiredness).
Tammy allegedly didn't like doctors so there'd likely be a lot missing from the official record; people don't tell their doctors everything even if they do go regularly. Then there's the fact doctors don't record everything accurately - I know my own records have errors, omissions, and outright lies in them. This idea that your doctor *knows* you hasn't been true for most people in generations!

Don't get me wrong, it would be unbelievable if Tammy's death was actually natural but if she was asphyxiated I feel sure there should have been more proof of it - it's possible to do without leaving trace evidence (fibres in the lungs etc) but you'd expect more injuries from crushing, restraining, or fighting back.
I also want to know exactly how they ruled out poisoning by malachite: Chad and Lori were all about malachite, repeatedly referenced 'malachite balm', malachite is highly poisonous and causes symptoms very like those experienced by Tammy and Alex.
Basically, I think they missed something and I don't like that they got a First Degree Murder conviction anyway.

One of the big GOT YOU! moments in the trial was in rebuttal where it came up that (1) Chad had searched how to turn off the location / GPS data on an iphone (Jan 2019) - Chad had an Android not an iPhone - (2) and an application to delete the location / GPS data associated with his account (Aug 2019) but his PC wasn't secure and was located in a family room so they can't prove either action was him (I didn't catch them say the application was made from a secure phone and not the desktop). Also, if he was smart enough to wipe his location data (incidentally this was before Lori and the kids had moved to Idaho, before he was even in the frame for anything) how did he not think to wipe his search history?!
IMHO all they *actually* proved was that Chad had an affair with and married a woman who was, along with her now-conveniently-deceased brother, implicated up to her eyebrows. Doesn't seem enough to me.

As I say though, there's no doubt Chad is guilty - your wife dies mysteriously (while you're having an affair with a woman whose last two husbands have also died mysteriously) and re-marry SEVENTEEN DAYS LATER??? Her minor kids go missing and you stay married, you go to Hawaii where she claims she has no minor kids and you stay married, she gets arrested and you stay married, the kids turn up murdered on your property and you get arrested too and you stay married, she is tried and convicted and sentenced to life without parole and you STILL STAY MARRIED??? That's not what innocent people do!!!

Who's Who
Killers and Conspirators
Lori Cox Vallow - mother and murderer; convicted 2023
Chad Daybell - Lori's 5th husband, murderer; convicted 30th May 2024. Wannabe religious leader / prophet
Alexander Lamar 'Alex' Cox Pastenes (51) 2019 - brother of Lori, alleged murderer (died before he could be investigated)
Zulema Pastenes - wife of Alex for about 5 minutes before he died, most people following the case suspect she was a co-conspirator as she was a follower of Chad & Lori
Melani Cope Boudreaux Pawlowski - Lori's niece, most people following the case suspect she was a co-conspirator as she was a follower of Chad & Lori. Her ex husband Brandon was the target of a botched shooting by Alex. She is now remarried and has at least one more child

Victims and those who died under suspicious circumstances
Stacey Cox Cope (31) 1998 - Lori's sister, mother of Melani. Her death was mysterious and while all the family but Alex were away... While most followers of the case consider Joe the first victim those who know about Stacey's death have other ideas. Curiously Lori had ANOTHER deceased sister, Laura Lee, who died in 1971 aged 42 days. That was two years before Lori was born but Lori creepily adopted Laura's nickname - Lolly - as her own
Joseph Anthony 'Joe' Ryan Jr (59) 2018 - Lori's 3rd husband, they had been acrimoniously divorced for many years at the time of his death. Supposedly died of a heart attack but his ex wife Lori both had him cremated without informing his family, and she got life insurance from him. Most people following the case believe he was Lori and Alex's first victim (see Stacey Cox Cope)
Leland Anthony 'Charles' Vallow (62) 2019 - Lori's 4th husband; was shot dead in supposed self defence by Alex Cox; Lori is to stand trial for his murder. Lori was shocked to discover Charles had changed his life insurance beneficiary to Kay
Tylee Ryan (17) 2019 - Lori's daughter, born to her 3rd husband Joe Ryan; her burned and dismembered remains were found on Chad Daybell's property. Lori continued to draw Social Security money for Tylee relating to Joe's death
Joshua Jaxon 'JJ' Vallow né Canaan Todd Trahan (7) 2019 - Lori's son, adopted with her 4th husband Charles Vallow; biological grandson of Kay Woodcock; found buried (intact) on Chad Daybell's property. Lori continued to draw Social security money for JJ relating to Charles' death

Tamara 'Tammy' Douglas Daybell (49) 2019 - Chad's 1st wife; prior to 'dying in her sleep' she was the target of a botched shooting by Alex Cox
Alexander Lamar 'Alex' Cox Pastenes (51) 2019 - see under 'killers and conspirators'

People on Chad and Lori's 'Dark' List (aka potential victims)
Brandon Boudreaux - Melani's 1st husband; Brandon was the alleged target of a botched shooting by Alex Cox
Braxton, Brees, Brighton, and Blake Boudreaux - at least two of Melani and Brandon's children were on the dark list; they are now in their father's custody
Heather Daybell - Chad's sister-in-law, wife of his brother Matt
Detective Ray Hermosillo - a police officer investigating Chad and Lori
Samantha Gwilliam - Chad's sister-in-law, sister of Tammy
Kay Woodcock - Kay was Charles Vallow's sister; Kay was the biological grandmother of JJ. If she had not called for a welfare check on JJ Lori and Chad might've got away with it. Kay and her husband Larry have been front and centre advocating for Lori and Chad's victims. lori had alternately claimed Kay was trying to abduct JJ and, after his disappearance, that he had gone to live with Kay.
Adam Cox - Lori's only surviving brother; Lori claimed he was out to kill her. Adam was a friend of Charles and they had hoped to stage an intervention to protect the kids... but then Charles was killed

Survivors (close relations not mentioned above - incomplete)
Colby Ryan - Lori's surviving (adult) child, born to her 2nd husband and adopted by her 3rd. When he was contacted about JJ's disappearance he asked after Tylee... who the police didn't even know about at that time!
Summer Cox Shiflet - Lori's only surviving sister
Emma Murray, Garth Daybell, Mark Daybell, Seth Daybell, Leah Murphy - Chad and Tammy's adult children

Other
Mandy Leger (46) 2022 - JJs biological mother. Lost custody to Kay and Larry Woodcock due to substance abuse issues and initially had visitation but JJ was adopted out while she was in rehab which devastated her. She had always hoped to be reunited with her son but her world fell apart when he was murdered. She died of a heart condition... or a broken heart.
Dennis Todd 'Todd' Trahan - JJs biological father. Lost custody to Kay and Larry (his mother and stepfather) due to substance abuse issues and initially had visitation. Trahan, as of JJ and Tylee's celebration of life in April 2024, was incarcerated.

#JusticeForJohnnyDepp

An open letter to Johnny Depp

"Tell the world, Johnny, tell them, Johnny Depp,

I, Johnny Depp, a man, I'm a victim too of domestic violence,

and see how many people believe or side with you." - Amber Heard

Well, sir... you did. And they did.

A lot of people believed you from the start. People called them Deppford Wives and misogynists.

A lot of people came to believe you over time. The media wrote them off as fans and trolls.

A lot of people came to believe you during the trial, hearing your story properly, and with all the facts finally available to us. Still the media wrote articles about 'the internet' siding with you. Like we're not all individual human beings with eyes and ears and the ability to think for ourselves. They tried to paint it as a war of words rather than of evidence, and the public as idiot sheep who'd huddle together without discernment.

What it came down to was what seven people on a Virginia jury thought.

They believed you.

They sided with you.

Unanimously.

Sorry, I'm British. I had to.

I can't begin to imagine what it has cost you - physically, emotionally, psychologically - to do this. To lay yourself bare before the world. To have all the lowest points of your life scrutinised, dissected... I imagine you feared the world would judge you harshly, but you did it anyway. 

I am so proud of you.

Not to suggest that you were in any way selfish but I know you told your truth for yourself, for your kids, for the people who matter to you... but this has done so much GOOD. I have seen so many people, men and women, opening up about the DV / SA  / false allegations they have suffered. Men especially are often talking about it for the first time because of you. Whether they were fans before is irrelevant, you're a fucking HERO now.

I really hope you've made inroads to changing the dialogue. Everything has been skewed in favour of women for far too long. A lot of people couldn't even imagine that being the wrong mindset before this. People have seen for themselves how messed up it is that she was believed on her word alone; her word that didn't ring true and a lot of times lacked even basic logic. I suspect there's a long wad to go before there's any real change toward true equality but that's not your battle.

You've fought so long and so hard for this I really hope this is the end of your nightmare.

I wish you healing, rebuilding... I hope your ability to love and trust will recover in time because you truly do deserve all the very best.

With the greatest of respect,

Heggie

JDvsAH

IF YOU CAN'T TELL WHAT THE TRIGGER WARNINGS ARE FROM THE TITLE DO NOT READ

THIS IS AN OPINION PIECE. AN EXPLANATION OF WHY I TOOK A PRO-JOHNNY STANCE LONG BEFORE THIS CASE WENT TO TRIAL AND WHY THAT STANCE HAS REMAINED UNCHANGED

I have been #TeamJohnny from the get-go. Not because I am a fan, but because it was, for me, the logical stance.

I am a female of the species but I identify as agender and I am egalitarian. Oppression, violence, victimhood... these things can be caused or exacerbated by gender but it's not all one way, and the Depp Vs Heard case is a prime example.

Amber Heard was believed because she is a woman. That's it. Not because her claims were proven true, supported by evidence or even plausible. Because of her sex-slash-gender-identity. Like women can't / don't / won't lie. Like they wouldn't lie about THAT.

Can you hear the eyeroll as I typed?!

Anyone can lie. Some more effectively than others. But believing a lie because of the sex of the person telling it? Beyond stupid.

I've had rows on social media with feminazis (so shall I call them if so shall they act) who would believe ANY woman, regardless. They would literally throw their fathers, brothers, partners and sons under the bus on the word of a stranger who just happens to be female. Zero loyalty, zero faith in the men in their lives. Nice.

So yeah, that's my starting point.

I do not #BelieveAllWomen or even #BelieveAllVictims as a default setting. Which is not to say I disbelieve them, of course. But it's this little thing called critical thinking: the analysis of available facts, evidence, observations, and arguments to form a judgment.

I can at least start at the chronological beginning.

When Johnny married Amber my knee-jerk reaction was OMFG he's got himself a gold-digger, she's gonna bring him down. Call it a premonition. I knew NOTHING about this woman.

When Amber first made her claims my knee-jerk reaction was OMFG she went THAT FAR???

First Allegations

In the first instance I don't know either of these people, obviously. However there's always unconscious bias - this is where gender is a very strong factor, along with race. Most people will lean toward the female, especially a pretty blonde one (see Missing White Woman Syndrome) whether they are overtly sexist or racist or not; it's almost a learned behaviour as the news more heavily reports missing white women / children creating the idea that men and women or children of colour are less vulnerable. Meanwhile, there are others who will default in favour of men, wealth, fame, or perceived power.

I defaulted in favour of Johnny Depp. Why? Because I am a misogynist who respects fame & wealth? I certainly hope not. I certainly believe it's because I know OF Johnny (whereas I only knew of Amber as his Mrs), and had been aware of him / his career for decades. I knew the man had substance abuse issues but from the outset it seemed curious that there had never been a sniff of violent or sexual scandal around his name.

Of course you never *know* but the fact he'd worked repeatedly with certain directors (eg. Tim Burton) and actresses (eg. Helena Bonham Carter, Keira Knightly) suggested that he wasn't a monster to work with.

This was a very short time later amplified by two of his highest profile exes (Vanessa Paradis and Winona Ryder) saying publicly NOT me too. Along with a number of co-stars (inc. Penelope Cruz and Kate Winslet) speaking of him positively. Of course, being an abuser in one relationship does not mean you will be in all of them. But, for me, it was telling that a number of high profile women said 'he wasn't like this with ME'. Naturally some of that might have been their fans asking them to say #MeToo or offering sympathy for their presumed past suffering at JDs hands. But again, respect for saying openly that it didn't happen.

Even more telling has been the distinct lack of anyone coming forward to say #MeToo. For a man now 58 that seems pretty solid. The only ex who spoke against him was Ellen Barkin who recalled him once throwing a bottle at a wall, had no idea of the context, and couldn't even remember how long their relationship lasted.

Honestly, at this point I've lost the plot as to when exactly which photos / statements came into the public eye so I'm just gonna look at the salient points individually.

The Photos

The newspapers carried photos of a 'bruised' Amber Heard coming out of court having applied for a restraining order. Even in grainy newsprint it looked like nothing. Looking at the photos presented in court with the 'bruises' supposedly shown in the 'best light' of the apartment and ignoring, for the moment, the idea of filters, resolution discrepancies etc etc I looked at the pics... is that a pimple? is that a mosquito bite? is it blusher? why can't we see her OTHER cheek for comparison?!

That's not to say she didn't have a bruise. *I* don't bruise well, especially on the face for some reason. *I* have tried to photograph injuries and failed. But then *I* have never tried to use my inadequate photos as 'evidence' in the press or in a court room.

Then there's the black eyes, broken nose, split lip that she supposedly had on the James Corden show. Yeah, not believing that either. Makeup on a split lip? I don't think so. Also, where's the show's make up artist testimony? And the mouth stretched wide photos? Lord, give me strength...

The Cabinet Video

When the cabinet video first came out several things were obvious:

• Amber was recording Johnny without his knowledge in his own home which is pretty gross
  
• He's clearly distressed
• She's clearly goading him
• The video was clearly edited

Did I believe it proved anything? Hell no.

Is violence against cabinetry illegal? Not if you own it. Criminal damage at most if you don't.

If fact, I felt it proved the opposite - he's upset, he's goaded... he slams a cabinet door? Fair amount of restraint there. If that's the most damning video you can leak there's a problem with the claim. And before anyone starts with the 'imperfect victim' argument as stated in the summing up:

“If you didn’t take pictures, it didn’t happen.

If you did take pictures, they’re fake.

If you didn’t tell your friends, you’re lying.

If you did tell your friends, they’re part of the hoax.

If you didn’t seek medical treatment, you weren’t injured.

If you did seek medical treatment, you’re crazy,” - Benjamin Rottenborn

She did take photos - but they don't fit with her testimony. We can SEE they're filtered, so yeah, FAKE. She also took videos - none of which managed to capture what she claims was happening. All the way up to this case she's been saying she has copious amounts of damning evidence. The evidence we've now seen, extensively, is 'meh' at best. If she'd made these claims on her WORD alone it would have looked better!

The Bottle Incident

This really needs its own headline but most of my reaction to this is the same as in testimony... it doesn't ring true. It's implausible in the extreme that she could have been assaulted in the way she described.

Sadly there are a LOT of comments online calling this out BY PEOPLE WHO HAVE SUFFERED IT.

There is NO WAY you can be raped with a bottle and 'not know' if it broke. If you were bleeding and in pain to the point you thought it was broken EMERGENCY MEDICAL CARE is not an optional extra. Ms Heard was in no way prevented from seeking medical care - she didn't. She was in no way unable to access medical care due to poverty or location either.

I've seen repeated claims she made and was photographed THE NEXT DAY walking and acting and dressed normally. Things many victims says is simply not possible.

I can't speak for whether those photos were taken the next day but every victim of this kind of assault, bottles broken or intact, says of her account THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS. Why do I believe these self-confessed survivors over Ms Heard? Because IT MAKES SENSE. The very idea of being violated with a potentially broken bottle is enough to make most females, if not most people, wince and cross their legs.

We're supposed to believe that Ms Heard was vulnerable, intimidated, trapped in an abusive relationship but where many / most DV survivors are separated and isolated by their abusers - she was surrounded by her employees, her friends, her sister. Many / most DV / SA survivors (in the US) don't have medical insurance or can't access healthcare due to cost, or fear that it'll be reported back to their abuser. That was never her situation and a lot of survivors are pretty angry that a woman with her wealth and privilege is claiming their level of disadvantage.

As with the Rottenborn statement above it's hard to imagine anyone being assaulted the way Ms Heard describes and deliberately NOT seeking help. If she had sought help she certainly wouldn't be 'crazy' for it - there'd be records, PROOFS of what did or did not happen.

The same is true of her alleged broken nose. I got my nose broken. It was on straight, it was not bleeding profusely, so I followed the NHS advice to just let it heal. Therefore it's not on record. It's perfectly possible Ms Heard did the same... but HER FACE IS HER LIVELIHOOD. It stretches credulity that she wouldn't have at least called a professional for advice or get it checked.

The Testimony

I have said it over and over throughout the trial... I expected acting. Both parties are professional, Hollywood actors for heaven's sake. Despite having the above detailed pre-conceived ideas I still expected to have to watch closely for tells and inconsistencies.

Boy, was I wrong.

If Johnny was acting it was immaculate. There are those who criticise his smiling in court but y'all expect stoic, stone-faced for six solid weeks?! He smiled at his team, with whom he clearly had a good rapport. He smiled at certain things that were said on the stand. There was context.

Amber on the other hand... What the HECKAMAJIG was all THAT about?! On the stand she was over-acting in the style of a dramatic five year old. Only most five year olds are more convincing. Fake tears (and I do think she had something untoward in that tissue - not least cos every damn time she wiped her nose on the back of her hand anyway). All the wrong facial expressions. The borderline rage when she was interrupted or corrected. Y'all don't need to be an expert in acting or body language to see that was dodgy AF.

Off the stand she was the epitome of a cold fish. Example: if Dr Curry had been saying such things about me I'd have been in floods of tears, bright red. Telling the world I'm totally unbalanced? There should be emotion. Nothing. Nose in air, perfect Ice Queen. It's not normal, it's not natural, and no power on this earth can convince me it's genuine.

I've seen commentary that Johnny presented badly on the witness stand. I disagree. It's not about 'performance'. A person can be low IQ, mentally impaired, struggle to express themselves and still they deserve to be heard. Johnny was not eloquent, he was not reciting a script; he was hesitant, nervous, embarrassed. 

Aside from expert witnesses, many of Johnny's were friends & employees of long-standing. And an ex girlfriend calling BS on one of Amber's lies about her.

Amber's witnesses included her sister. And a bunch of friends who admitted they'd been freeloading off Johnny.

Johnny's account gelled with what the experts set, what his other witnesses said. At times, even with the opposition testimony!

Amber's made no sense in and of itself and did not match with anyone else's. How can you ever reconcile that? Her testimony didn't gel with the people she and her team *chose* to back her up.

So, I was working on this opinion piece explaining my personal stance between summing up and verdict. I am literally typing this waiting as the clock ticks down and the courtroom filling up... I think I better leave my reaction for another blog. YIKES!